To Those Who Go Before Us

To the people whose lives were examples for us
Who showed us the way without trying;

To those who cared more deeply than was expected of them;

To those who quietly prepared routes for us
Not knowing where those paths would take us;

To those whose offhanded comments steered us
Towards the places we’d find and make lifelong friends;

To those who lovingly looked out for us as one of their own children
From near or far;

To those who taught us what we needed to know
To be prepared for what lay ahead;

To those who go before us and will never know
The fullness of our love and gratitude;

Thank you for everything you did, for who you were,
For who you continue to be in our hearts and memories.

We love you.


Don’t You Forget About Me

Don’t you forget about me
Standing over here quietly
Unsure how to draw attention to myself
Without feeling selfish
I don’t need the spotlight
Just don’t leave me in the shadows
My silence doesn’t mean I’m fine
This heart is heavy tonight
With much unspoken struggle and concern
Words will come once presence is felt

-June 3 2018


Pandemic Prose Ponderings

Is there room for me at the table?
Did you remember I was coming for dinner tonight?
I came hungry in anticipation
Even skipped out on instant noodles at home

There are a lot more cars in the driveway
Than I expected
I must have missed a group text
Hope it’s not a loud party
Where we can barely understand each other
And you know I’m even here

– March 2021


Look At Me

I go from here to there
did you notice me waving
remove the mirrors blocking your view
to see beyond what’s at arm’s length:
a world of people, some whom don’t feel the focus
of familiar eyes upon them
you only see objects reflecting the elements of self
and nothing more

I’m sitting down, tired of holding my arms up in the air
and internally pretending i’m actually ok
come and look intently, patiently
until your eyes can see within, where hearts connect in silent union
and time pauses momentarily
when i can absorb the fact i am not being ignored
but am seen and briefly known once again

– January 12, 2020


Fall in Reykjavik

Strong winds blow tonight

Whipping rain at me sideways

I try to shield myself from it

But it is a vain effort here in this place

From inside my room I still hear you

Making your presence known to all

The air and skies are not calm this evening

Yet I am comfortable, content

My heart still feels at home right now

Peaceful in the midst of this perceived gloominess


Train Car Reflections

I chase it blindly
constantly searching for what I think I desire
Craving what I am not yet ready for
Yearning for things I am not equipped to handle

The emptiness is beginning to make itself known
Laws of diminishing returns prove themselves true
What once brought even momentary satisfaction
Is but a faint memory
A quiet echo of a moment long past

Yet I keep looking in the same places
For more of what doesn’t fill the void
Lesson repetition fails to penetrate the surface
How many times will it take
To realize I’m looking in the wrong places


my flower

i stare at a green stem
with this small bud looking thing
growing off the top of it
someone told me to sit there
and watch this little plant
while he went to take care of other matters
he said to tend to it
water this little plant daily
and that i was to just wait and
be surprised in time
i saw him do the same with others around me
giving them a plant to care for
the weeks went by and i followed my orders
nothing seems to be happening i said
everyone else’s plants are more beautiful
than mine
i look and see the splendor and fruits of their labor
before me and i grow restless
desiring my plant to show itself off to the world
that same someone who gave me this stupid plant
said i’m supposed to wait
i asked him why i had to when everyone else’s plants
have blossomed into awe inspiring flowers
that splash the field with
blues and reds and yellows
he told me to continue to wait
that the final result would please me
and joy would fill me
so after a while longer of tending and watering
i began to see a spark of life
it was beginning to open
the glory i saw next overcame me
and joy filled so completely
it came out from my eyes
rivers running down my face
and my flower was indeed wonderful
definitely worth the work
it was a gift i did not deserve
but one i received anyway



March 24, 2002

Open a door to a room
peer inside to see that it contains
the images of a life that it once held
of a child, a young boy
expectations of car posters, baseball cards
and last night’s after-dinner snack plate
are all unfulfilled
what is found?
four walls that find themselves naked
empty drawers and notebooks from no childhood hobbies
a tv rarely used for anything but re-runs
seen 10 times over already
it’s unknowinlgy becoming his shield
from what much of the world others find as normal
the latest (and not so latest) movies are not on schedule
children’s rhymes and songs had no place here
and now – when this boy stands in the mirror
he sees a reflection of a life he feels few
can truly connect with
points of contact are few and far between
he knows all this is not that important in the end
yet he demands to know why it frustrates him so much